It is said that our cells and genes have memories. That while we are being created and our parent’s genes are combining to generate our one of a kind person, not only are they passing us their physical traits, but also their emotional. We are now discovering that we are more like our parents then ever and not just the typical “you have your mom’s nose or your dad’s eyes.” Rather those small quirks, those fears, insecurities or things that brought them joy, that are being passed along with the same genes that are shaping our eye color, or the size of our feet.
As a child I would willing place myself in time out, because I didn’t do as my mom told me, or I did what I wasn’t supposed to do. I would ground myself or restrict myself from things that I loved to do. My family all laughs at this now, and they did then too, but realizing where this may have come from adds a new level of complexity to my life.
My self punishment and my overdramatic nature, didn’t come upon because I watched to much T.V. or because I was competing for attention from another sibling (I’m an only child). And although it is a sight to see and a story to be told of the young girl who puts herself in time out, to realize the meaning and the story that it all stems from seems a much more serious matter.
I have been battling with my father’s demons in my own body for years, growing up my father had told me of how his dad had been hard on him. How he never felt that he was good enough for him. I wonder now if my feelings of always being in trouble are because my dad felt that he could do no right in his father’s eyes. Is this why I always penalized myself even if it was unprompted? Could this be the reason behind so many fits of angst and anxiety? In a strange way I feel more connected to my dad now, knowing that this insecurity we both share is something we can both battle together, and overcome. It is an interesting premise and one that I would ask everyone to think about. How many of your personality characteristics have come from memories that your parents cells have given you?